Brainstorm five "what if" questions, she said. Fast. Choose one. And then let's jam about it.
Like today. A week later.
I've learned not to stew in a pot of "what if's" or swim in an ocean of regrets any more. Too hot. Too deep. But I do sometimes wonder in a curious way how my life might be different. And occasionally I still wince at some of my naive and stupid choices. But only for a moment. Because I can see how God takes my out-of-tune self and orchestrates a moving symphony.
One He continues to write.
So I don't dwell in those shadows. Takes too much energy.
Then I thought about stuff like what if I got to go to somewhere as a Compassion blogger or to Kenya on a sponsor tour? Or what if I got to visit the Holy Land?
Or what if I actually finished and published a novel?
But it needed to be something that I had some control over--now--with results to report on within the week.
So I came up with a list that doesn't touch some of the more noble and deep ones that others posted, but I could focus on one for a week and see where it led.
Maybe an open door of possibility. Maybe a path to what could be.
1. What if I gave up my addiction?
2. What if I walked every day?
3. What if I was in bed by 11 every night?
4. What if I sat and did nothing for at least 15 minutes every day?
5. What if I took that online novel-writing course?
Not very deep. Simple. Maybe even a bit hokey.
But what if I gave up my addiction?
Hi. My name is Snady.
And I am a Bejeweled Blitzaholic.
What if I gave up that time sucker? No more clacking jewels or colorful explosions. No more words of affirmation and encouragement. "AWEsome!" "Spec-TAC-ular!" No more one more game, one more minute turning into one more hour.
No more trying to beat my friends with scores over 300,000. No more late nights. No more blurry eyes or cricked neck.
And so I did!
I gave it up.
Deleted the application from Facebook.
For a whole week.
And what have I done with that leftover time?
I've walked. Only twice this week for 45 minutes. Three times if you count today. But that's more than last week. Or the week before, or before, or before.
I watched the dust rise from behind tractors.I marveled at tine-straight furrows and pondered my own life path that looks more like a curly straw.
I inhaled the aroma of fresh-turned earth and listened to frogs plop into puddle-ponds pooled in last year's corn stalks. I patted passing horses. I took pictures as possible illustrations for blog posts.
And I've been to bed before 11. Even before 1 a.m. Every night but one when I got caught up writing.
I sat still once.
I stripped more wallpaper while I watched the History Channel for 6 hours!
I read more.
I don't know if it's all because of giving up a game. Maybe I just want to believe that. But surely I didn't spend THAT many hours playing.
I'm still thinking about the class. I have until the end of the month for the specific one I'm thinking about.
And I joined ACFW just this morning. On my to-do list for months.
And so with my new-found time, my new-found health (I'm giving up M&M's too, doncha know--maybe), and even with a soon-to-come new granddaughter to dote on, what new movement might God write next?
Because I said good-bye to an addiction.
What if I finish a novel by the end of the year?
Is it possible?
Could it be?
What if . . . ?
NOTE: To read how others responded to this challenge, head over to the Faith Barista Jam.
Do you live with regrets? Do you wallow in the past?
Do you have any "what ifs" that could open the door to a "what could be?"
What would you throw off, do, change, start if you believed God was in it?
"I run for dear life to God, I'll never live to regret it." Psalm 71:3 (Message)
Copyright © 2010 by Sandra Heska King