So Long. Good-bye. Farewell.

Last week Bonnie Gray invited me in a blog comment here to take a "What If" challenge.

Brainstorm five "what if" questions, she said. Fast. Choose one. And then let's jam about it.

Like today. A week later.

Say what?

I've learned not to stew in a pot of "what if's" or swim in an ocean of regrets any more. Too hot. Too deep. But I do sometimes wonder in a curious way how my life might be different. And occasionally I still wince at some of my naive and stupid choices. But only for a moment. Because I can see how God takes my out-of-tune self and orchestrates a moving symphony.

One He continues to write.

Romantic.

Eternal.

So I don't dwell in those shadows. Takes too much energy.

Then I thought about stuff like what if I got to go to somewhere as a Compassion blogger or to Kenya on a sponsor tour? Or what if I got to visit the Holy Land?

Or what if I actually finished and published a novel?

But it needed to be something that I had some control over--now--with results to report on within the week.

So I came up with a list that doesn't touch some of the more noble and deep ones that others posted, but I could focus on one for a week and see where it led.

Maybe an open door of possibility. Maybe a path to what could be.

1. What if I gave up my addiction?
2. What if I walked every day?
3. What if I was in bed by 11 every night?
4. What if I sat and did nothing for at least 15 minutes every day?
5. What if I took that online novel-writing course?

Not very deep. Simple. Maybe even a bit hokey.

But what if I gave up my addiction?

Hi. My name is Snady.

And I am a Bejeweled Blitzaholic.

What if I gave up that time sucker? No more clacking jewels or colorful explosions. No more words of affirmation and encouragement. "AWEsome!" "Spec-TAC-ular!" No more one more game, one more minute turning into one more hour.

Or more.

No more trying to beat my friends with scores over 300,000. No more late nights. No more blurry eyes or cricked neck.

And so I did!

I gave it up.

Deleted the application from Facebook.

Yup.

Gone.

For a whole week.

Cold turkey.

So long.

Good-bye.

Farewell.

Forever.

And what have I done with that leftover time?

I've walked. Only twice this week for 45 minutes. Three times if you count today. But that's more than last week. Or the week before, or before, or before.

I watched the dust rise from behind tractors.I marveled at tine-straight furrows and pondered my own life path that looks more like a curly straw.

I inhaled the aroma of fresh-turned earth and listened to frogs plop into puddle-ponds pooled in last year's corn stalks. I patted passing horses. I took pictures as possible illustrations for blog posts.

And I've been to bed before 11. Even before 1 a.m. Every night but one when I got caught up writing.

I sat still once.

I stripped more wallpaper while I watched the History Channel for 6 hours!

I read more.

I don't know if it's all because of giving up a game. Maybe I just want to believe that. But surely I didn't spend THAT many hours playing.

I hope.

Anyway.

I'm still thinking about the class. I have until the end of the month for the specific one I'm thinking about.

And I joined ACFW just this morning. On my to-do list for months.

And so with my new-found time, my new-found health (I'm giving up M&M's too, doncha know--maybe), and even with a soon-to-come new granddaughter to dote on, what new movement might God write next?

Because I said good-bye to an addiction.

What if I finish a novel by the end of the year?

Is it possible?

Could it be?

What if . . . ?

NOTE: To read how others responded to this challenge, head over to the Faith Barista Jam.

Do you live with regrets? Do you wallow in the past?

Do you have any "what ifs" that could open the door to a "what could be?"

What would you throw off, do, change, start if you believed God was in it?

"I run for dear life to God, I'll never live to regret it." Psalm 71:3 (Message)

Copyright © 2010 by Sandra Heska King

"Tis a Gift to be Simple

 In my quest for simplicity, I'm often drawn back to my battered book (1981) by Richard Foster, Freedom of Simplicity. He talks about the passion to possess and how the pace of our world leaves us feeling fractured and fragmented.

Even frantic.

I so get that.

Although thankfully peace occupies more space in my pocket these days.

Richard reminds us of the paradox of simplicity.

It is both easy and difficult.
It is both simple and complex.
It is both internal and external.
It is both a grace and a discipline.
We do not necessarily fit it, but it fits us.

An unsimple gift.

The longing of my heart.

My Center and my periphery.

Focus over goal.

Release to gain.
Possess but not prize.
Free to serve.
Stay to go.
Stand firm to bow and to bend.

And when I turn 'round, as in the old Shaker hymn, no matter what direction, I want to see Jesus.

Only.

A simple gift.

Close your eyes and listen to this simply beautiful song.



Which way are you turning? Do you crave simplicity? What does simplicity mean to you?

"I recommend to you holy simplicity." ~Francis de Sales

Copyright © 2009 by Sandra Heska King

Too Much Stuff

My son moved back to town. Even though his first apartment was only the fling of a Frisbee from work. He missed us. He missed his hometown. So he decided to trade spaces. In fact, he paid rent on two digs this month in order to secure a good deal on the new place, now 20-plus miles from "the shop."

He admits to being "OCD." Not Monk. But very particular. Can't tell that anyone ever lived in the old rental. Literally. Looks better than when he moved in.

Also not a procrastinator. He ruminated the plan. Then bolted like a buck fleeing a bullet. Company ready within a couple days.

We visited him Friday night. Practically new two-building complex. Even smells new. One bedroom apartment supplied with a dishwasher, over-the-range microwave, washer and dryer for about $100 less than the other place. Vaulted ceiling in the living room. Woods with a view.

There's a calm peacefulness to this 21-year-old's surroundings. Simple. Sleek. Clean. Collages of family and friends. No scattered photos. No clutter.

Color me green.

Abby and I thought we had made real progress cleaning off her desk Saturday. I mean, we even believed FINDING the desk was a major deal. Jeremy took one look at the white bill organizer, breast cancer pink file box, and two goblets on the upper shelf and declared, "Too much stuff."

So today I struggle with jealously and wistfulness. Looking around with my son's eyes. And even after the declutter rampage of the last year, I say with him:

Too much stuff!

Simplicity still out of reach.

And it begins again.

What stuff can you eliminate from your surroundings or life today?

"There are two ways to get enough: one is to continue to accumulate more and more. The other is to desire less." ~G.K. Chesterton

Copyright © 2009 by Sandra Heska King

Calling Out Clutter

My yearning for simplicity began years ago. Searching for it has been an elusive journey along quiet roads and through tangled brush. Grasping it has been like trying to capture a butterfly with bare hands. Just when I think I've almost got it, it flutters away.

A year ago I realized I was exhausted, overwhelmed, out of control. I was still living life in frantic fragments. My joy was ebbing, my peace was fading, my energy was sagging, and my focus was blurring. By all appearances I was doing pretty well, except for the occasional--okay, frequent--temper tantrum and sometimes falling asleep on my keyboard because of only sleeping a few hours at night. But inwardly I was wasting away. I did not see a stamp of eternity on many of my activities, and I felt like I was chasing the wind.

Clutter had overtaken me again, and it was time to face it down once and for all. And although it was scary, I quit work to do full-time battle.

First, though, I had to call the enemy out, distill it down, in order to attack it. What I realized after several days--no, more like several weeks--of doing nothing but resting was that I actually needed to fight on 3 fronts. And I would have to simultaneously tackle them because they were working together to defeat me.

1. Home clutter.
2. Head clutter.
3. Heart clutter.

It was time to tear down strongholds once and for all, to throw off everything that encumbered, to once again find my true calling and walk in it. It was time to find my center.

I love what Thomas Kelly said: "Life from the Center is a life of unhurried peace and power. It is simple. It is serene. It is amazing. It is triumphant. It is radiant. It takes no time, but it occupies all our time. And it makes our life programs new and overcoming."

That's what I want. That's where I'm heading.

Center.

"As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God." Psalm 42:1

Are you panting through life or are you panting for God?

What Is Clutter? Part 2

Life was so simple.

I remember our first home in 1971--a small brick house with pink trim, rented from a man whose deceased dad had had a perennial green thumb. Something was always blooming in the yard. There were 2 small bedrooms--one with a door that opened to the backyard. We had a small living room, a kitchen, and a tiny dining area. I remember picking up our mail off the front closet floor. That's where it fell when the mailman pushed it through the slot outside into the closet. I remember that our pink bathroom had "issues." The wall was crumbling into the bathtub, so we could not bathe or shower in there. The landlord was always coming to fix it, but always got sidetracked. Luckily there was a basement shower. I showered before dark because we shared the basement with a "pet" bat.

That little house was furnished with the 4 rooms of furniture my hubby had purchased for $400. We had a bed, chest, and dresser--that bowed in the center after our first move, presumably from items that had been stacked on top of it. Dennis' bedroom office held a desk, chair and file cabinet. We had a Formica table with 4 yellow and brown chairs (in the kitchen) and a black vinyl recliner and studio couch. The back of that couch folded down to make a bed. I remember the night our friend rolled over too far on the back, and the whole couch rolled with him, and both crashed to the floor. Dennis brought 2 step-type end tables and 2 yellow lamps. I contributed another Formica table and 4 red and black chairs for our "formal" dining room and my great-grandmother's cedar chest that served as a TV stand for years.

My mother-in-law bought me a black rocking chair with red cushions that first Christmas along with a yellow and white umbrella stand filled with peacock feathers confiscated from my father-in-law's birds.

Better Homes and Gardens would have had no interest in our black, red, and yellow decorating scheme.

But we were so happy. We could zip through cleaning that house in an hour on Saturday morning and then spend the rest of the weekend with his parents and our horses.

Life was so simple.

And we have way cool stories.

I think back on those days and realize I really was happier before we started exchanging furniture with character for new pieces and then antiques. And then inherited things. And collections. And paper. And clothes--to fit expanded activities. And toys and kids clothes and more furniture and more collections and books. Wait--we aren't going to talk about the books.

Then there were bins and boxes and shelves needed for storing stuff. But it began to spill over as our lives got more complicated. Instead of taking care of things, I moved things from here to there. I lost or forgot about bills. We were late for important dates because we couldn't find the right clothes or directions. Finding those half dozen pictures for student of the week created a major crisis and, yes, even temper tantrums.

You get the picture. We were under a full-blown clutter attack.

What is clutter? Clutter consists of "stuff" that fills our hunger with emptiness. Things that:

1. Steal our joy.
2. Steal our peace.
3. Steal our energy.
4. Steal our focus.

God stoppers.

And it's more than environmental.

I'll talk about that next time.

"...let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles..." Hebrews 12:1

What is stealing your joy, your peace, your energy, your focus?

What Is Clutter? Part 1

I've been on "sabbatical" for the last year in order to declutter my mind, my body, my spirit, and my surroundings. With years of accumulated "stuff" as a result of traveling over several bumpy roads, there wasn't too much tread left on my tires. I was wearing out.

I'm still a work in progress, but several friends have asked how I've done it, am doing it. So I'm going to talk about clutter and decluttering for the next few posts.

What is clutter? Dictionaries give several definitions, including:

1. a confused multitude of things
2. state of disorder
3. untidy collection of objects
4. a condition of disorderliness or overcrowding
5. images on a screen that hinder observation
6. disorganized mess
7. scattered or disordered things that impede movement or reduce effectiveness.

Some interesting words similar to clutter include:

1. confusion--a mental state characterized by lack of clear and orderly thought and behavior
2. mare's nest--complicated or confused situation; a discovery at first thought to be important or valuable but subsequently found to be an illusion, a hoax, or valuelessa
3. cultch--(from 1913 Webster's) - definitions include rubbish, debris, refuse
4. junk--something of poor quality
5. litter--rubbish carelessly dropped or left about
6. stuff--fill completely, stuff

I was intrigued to see that the word clutter has its origin from the middle English word, clotteren, which means to clot.

Chew on this for now. More next time.

"More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ." Philippians 3:8 (NAS)

What insights do you gain from the definitions above?